boring.

...That's right. My scarf matches my tights. Ba-bam!

already yours

Seems like life is everywhere these days, beautiful and tough as fuck and liberating and exhausting. I'm surviving, but I'd rather be living.

Z. helped re-frame everything for me... "Everything is going to be okay. We are good people who try hard with good animals, family and friends who love us and at the end of the day that's all that matters."

He speaks the truth. I spent some time with A., it's the end of a long day, and Charlie is curled up on top of my barefeet, keeping them warm. It really is all that matters.

bahamas - What's Worse

(A. and I saw bahamas open for Amy Millan, and the more I listen to him, the more I dig it.)

carve a place.

There's a fire in my soul.

And I can survive anything

Stars - On Peak Hill

let's meet in the middle.

I don't post on here when things are happy, it seems. Oops.

School is a bit tough right now. Friends even seem tough sometimes. Family is almost tough all the time.

But there are people who see the light in me. And people who will bring by Pads when I'm working at the bar. And family who will shout about how intelligent and beautiful and strong I am.

Optimism comes true.

Owl City - Fireflies

PS. Today, I am a sucker for sweet synth pop. Tomorrow, it'll probably make my teeth hurt. Metaphorically speaking.

fml.

Contrary to popular belief, I don't like being the bad one.

Pink Mountaintops - While We Were Dreaming

tarnish the gold heart, you've already broken her body.

I'm the one swearing as she leaves the grocery store because she forgot to buy something -- usually, the main thing she went there to buy. And by the time I get home, I've forgotten that I've forgotten, so I swear all over again.

I don't forget you though. The lot of you. The one who played with every emotion, pulled and plucked, snapping my heartstrings. The one who liked me best with my body shoved against a wall, a hand to the throat, a fist to the face. The one who devalued every part of my mind, body, and soul. The one who ignored my absolute existence.

I'm going through life alone. And I don't want to. And it's your fault.

One day, I'll be strong enough to forgive you. The lot of you. And maybe even forget you. But until then, I'm weak, and it's your fault.

Dan Mangan - Robots

Ahhh shit!!

I feel like I've been bitching and complaining too often... so, in light of taking myself so seriously, it's time to laugh at myself.

And, if I do say so myself, I think I'm pretty funny.

Buck 65 - Phil